Saturday, September 13, 2014

What It Means To Truly Have Faith: A Night Of Joy Story♥

Happiness is a form of courage... Hello family and friends, I'm sure you've been waiting for an update on what has become of me since there seemed to be a lot of talk about feeling hopeless and also a lot of struggle that seems to always present itself to me. Let me tell you. This blog is no longer going to talk about that.

I've found a new perspective thanks to a vacation that at first was forced upon me. As a family, we all wanted to attend Night of Joy since we hadn't attended since 2011, and as you already know, life really has happened to me since. Yet, Jayde has found a new love for God recently and she really wanted us to go because this year, one of her favorite worship groups was going to be there. The Australian internationally known worship group Hillsong United. Because her determination would not waver, Jayde went and purchased two tickets as a birthday gift to my mom. My mom wasn't very happy about it at first because beside the event ticket, the cost of food, lodging, and gas were not included. Yet, once Jamie and I also purchased our own tickets, it was official that we were going.
I knew that God found a way for us to buy the tickets, he really wanted us present at this event.

Lo and behold, my mom ended up having enough Starpoints for one night's stay at the nearest Sheraton hotel that was four miles away from the Magic Kingdom where the Night of Joy takes place. I think my mom really found comfort in this because she started becoming a little excited for our short vacation to worship Jesus in the happiest place on Earth. It's obvious God took care of all the little details so we could have a night of fun and worship. Thank you God♥

I'm not really sure how much my family members needed the getaway but I sure did. At the pool once we got to the hotel, I started to cheer up as I was soaking up the sun and sitting reading my book. Then, it was nice to finally get to know my mom's cousin Jeanie. Her and her son Jason accompanied us by the pool, went to lunch with us at Olive Garden, and helped us maneuver the Disney parks like no other.

Before I get to the actual Disney experience, let me give you some illustrations:






 Two Polish beauties♥


Once inside the park, we had a lot of perks thanks to the fact that Jeanie goes to Disney a lot and has an annual pass. She also had the app on her phone that tells you which rides have little to no wait so we breezed through the park like professionals.



First we visited the Haunted Mansion ride, then rode the Buzz Lightyear ride,  visited Carousel of Progress  attraction, rode the Winnie the Pooh ride, and visited the Mickey's Philharmonic attraction. Overall, it was fun to basically visit attractions we usually pass by when we visit the Magic Kingdom.

Then, as of 7p.m., only guests with Night of Joy wristbands were allowed in the park and Night of Joy officially began.


Mom and I went to the Building 429 concert while Jayde and Jamie ventured around the park attempting to ride more rides. They rode Space Mountain, the teacups, and Seven Dwarfs Mine Train. Rain poured on our heads like there was no tomorrow. Yet, we stood there and just worshiped the man himself, Jesus♥ 


Surprisingly, the rain did not let up for a good three hours. Not through the whole Building 429 concert, not through Matt Maher 's set, but not until about 9:30 that night. It was funny but when we both met up for a snack break, we ended up finding out we all were watching Matt Maher's set even though we were separated. Haha how ironic is that. Anyway, that's what true faith is right? True faith is standing in the rain, looking at Jesus and knowing that you will not be overtaken despite what stormy circumstances are happening in your life. This too shall pass. All metaphors aside, standing in the physical rain is not a good idea because it's not healthy. It really is true that you do get sick for playing in the rain but I'll get to that later. 

Speaking of rain, please read the collaboration blog my friend Jazmine and I did on her blog about depression.

Back to Night of Joy, once we fueled up on good ole Disney french fries, chlorinated water, and coffee, we were ready for round two of Night of Joy. Mom and I joined Jamie and Jayde for another round of the Buzz Lightyear ride, and then got in line for Mandisa's concert. Mandisa was an American Idol finalist on the fifth season of the show and she didn't win but she obviously won in terms of destiny because now she uses music and song to bring hope to millions around the world, as long as spreading the good news of the gospel. Mandisa's set was non stop Jesus Freaking. The entirety of her set was spent dancing and jumping around. Sidenote: all the Night of Joy concerts are standing room only if that wasn't obvious. It was awesome but during her performance of Good Morning, she suprised the whole crowd with a guest performance by American Idol Season 8 finalist Danny Gokey. who sang his new single, Hope in Front of Me.

The night before I went to night of Joy I literally wrote in my journal: I need a definite sign that things are going to be better than all right... they will be amazing again! I mean, I'm not a robot and I'm sure as heck not a normal twenty-three year old but despite all the battle scars I have and the struggles I've yet to encounter, I always keep my faith turned up high. Yet, because I'm human and am fully capable of reaching my limit, I did find myself feeling a bit hopeless before Night of Joy. I had forgotten that the joy of the Lord was meant to be my strength and that I am a prisoner of hope. (See Nehemiah 8:10 and Zechariah 9:12)♥

During Mandisa's set, she spoke about the fact that lately she'd been tweeting some encouraging things and felt that there was someone here tonight who needed encouragement. She went on to say, "I don't know what you are going through right now, whether good or bad, but I do know that you feel like you are hopeless. I'm here to tell you tonight that it's going to get better." ♥

I couldn't stop crying as she said that and I looked over and my mom was also crying. Talk about being in God's presence. It was just another powerful moment that I am so grateful God got me right where I was meant to be just so that he could knock me off my feet with that love letter of a message. Nothing truly is impossible with God.

After Mandisa, we lined up for the For King & Country concert which took place at 12:10 a.m. By that time, our feet were in so much pain but we lived through it and they took the stage and opened with Fix Your Eyes. It was amazing. I was awed by how good they were in concert. They even came out into the audience and shook people's hands and everything. It was amazing. I really liked their song they wrote for their friend during his battle with depression. It encouraged me greatly. 

Saturday night, Mom and I watched the Night of Joy online since it was live streaming for the first time ever since the whole weekend was completely sold out. Saturday night's lineup was amazing with Mercy Me, Colton Dixon, Casting Crowns, and Britt Nicole in concert.

Overall, Night of Joy was an amazing experience and since then, life has been a bit less chaotic in it's own right despite the fact that I still have financial struggles with paying for school and no employment or that I ended up with a cold throughout most of this week. Yet, I still haven't heard from financial aid regarding the status of my two scholarships but somehow $138 was given to me toward my current Saint Leo bill so my monthly payment is down to $88. God is so good. Now I just have to come up with the money to buy the other textbook I need this semester but I don't have a care about it because I know God will provide.♥

My confession continues to be I believe God and will see his glory.

Until next time, remember: It's not over yet. And as far as having faith goes, religion will not save you. Not Catholicism, not Buddhism, not Islam. Only Jesus saves. Only Jesus died so you could live.♥

When you’re all out of heart and out of hope 
And you don’t really know which way to go 
Come on, come on, run to Jesus 
If you’re lost and you don’t know where to start 
It don’t really matter where you are 
Come on, come on, come on, yeah, run to Jesus, run to Jesus - Francesca Battistelli, Run To Jesus♥

Love Times Infinity, 
Chelsea 
xoxo
God Bless!
~Just Keep Swimming~

Enjoy these pictures of Katrina and Hazel showing their Disney side haha.


























Thursday, September 4, 2014

Nothing is Impossible with God (Matthew 19:26)

Happiness is a form of courage... Today, I am writing because it seems that once again, I have to fight for my right to a college education.

Because of the fact that I am only taking 6 credits (which I was forced to because I was only given dean approval for two online classes, because to take four at the same time would mean the school would only get $250) my financial aid is being cut in half so I will only be getting $2542 when my classes for the semester cost me $3120. I still owe them $452 for my current payment plan.

This all feels like an incredible pressure because I will not get my need-based grants and scholarships based solely on someone else's decision. I am not able to live on campus taking less than 12 credits anyway so this is the reason I don't still live on campus (along with the fact of refusing to take on-campus marketing classes because I don't do well in them). Living on campus though was the only reason I had a job because I had work-study and worked at the library. I have not found a job all summer in my area because according to different sources, I am either too qualified for minimum wage work or not qualified enough.

Despite this whole struggle, I want everyone to know that nothing is impossible. This whole things just proves that God is the only source. I've watched God pay college tuition bills totally almost $10,000 altogether so I know that this $1230 I need to be debt free will be chump change for him. After all, he is the King of Kings. Where God gives vision, he always provides provision.

The only thing that hurts is the plans I had for the refund money I was thinking I would get. One plan was to get another laptop with video editing software on it and a camera so I could shoot a really awesome video for the Dr. Pepper Tuition Giveway. The girl in the lead right now has over 1000 votes so I really have some tough competition.

Ultimately, I just want everyone to know that I still believe nothing is impossible with God. I still believe God and I know I will see his glory.

This morning, I woke up and wrote a poem about all the difficulties that presented themselves before me yesterday. I called it R.I.P.
R.I.P.

To my friendship with you
covered in black and blues 
from all the abuse

it's a shame 
you lost a friend
so tried and true.

To my fears and doubts
I will tie them up; lock them up
They will not get out

To poverty, sickness, addiction, and lack
Christ
won the smack
down for each of these things
when he died on a tree.

He went to hell and suffered 
unimaginable pain
just so I could have life more abundantly
meant to be lived
more courageously,
fearless and brave.

Jesus approached me last night
and said,
Child, where is your faith?

He holds the keys 
to death and the grave
and says,
Friend, you can do all things through me.

Now, I must believe in God and the manifestation of his glory.

Today, I was reading my Joyce Meyer magazine and there was an article by one of her long-time employees about doing it afraid and it spoke to me in a new way: Don't ever let fear keep you from your destiny. It may not be easy, but God will be right there to meet you along the way.

So all I ask of anyone reading this is three things:

Don't lose hope (for me or anyone else) ever.

Keep voting for the Dr. Pepper scholarship for me (see above link)

Donate here if you would like to help me in any way while I continue to look for a job and apply for scholarships.

Until next time, remember: Jail didn't make me find God; he's always been there. They can lock me up but my spirit and my love can never be confined to prison walls.-Lil Wayne♥

Love Times Infinity,
Chelsea
xoxo
God Bless!
~Just Keep Swimming~

Sunday, August 31, 2014

There is nothing flowery about this post

Happiness is a form of courage...I honestly never know who reads my posts on social media and I don't know who reads my blogs since most of my friends don't tell me they read it. I don't post it to get compliments. I post it to say what needs to be said. That is how I view all my internet posts. So reader disclaimer: if this post offends anyone, I'm just brave enough to say what nobody else is saying.♥

Before I get to the heart of the matter, I guess I'll give you an overview as to what life is like now that I live at home and do school from home. At first, it seemed like a pretty heavy burden to know I was going to be stuck at home and not going back to physical school. Not really for any specific reason other than freedom and the life I had there. It's a life I don't have at home. One where I have a job, a room of my own, food usually always at my disposal or thrown down the garbage disposal (depends on the day), and the ability to hang out with people my age (including members of the opposite sex). Ultimately, it was almost like I forgot basically how much I hated living on campus and why.

I'm not going to go on a rant of all the reasons why I think Saint Leo isn't the best school because I'm still a student there but I will just say it's nice that I no longer have to spend the majority of my time feeling like I always have to be on, as in feeling like I have to measure up and impress everybody  and I don't have to eat any meals alone anymore, so that's a wonderful change in pace.

Long story short, I had so much less pressure doing my schoolwork from home. I didn't have to waste time going to a physical classroom and listening to a professor just preach to me about nonsense instead of the material. I could take breaks whenever I wanted and I also didn't have to stress wondering if I was going to complete all my homework in time because I had to go work endless shifts at a work study job where I was expected to also always be on. I didn't have to dress up or even put on make-up. It's not like I never left my house because now that my sister Jayde is in college (and no, she isn't attending Saint Leo) , I go to the public library with her or I even visited her college campus which was awesome (they had this whole welcome week event going on all week (I don't know about you but I cannot turn down free food ) :)

Plus, it's important that I am with my family during this difficult season in our lives. I'm loving being with my dogs every day and my family and I are becoming closer now that we are all together again. It isn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. It's not perfect, that's for sure, but it's perfect for right now and I'm learning to be grateful for this season I'm in every single day.

I also started journaling more via Tumblr since I really hate being that friend that constantly texts her friends when she's going through a trying time. I prefer to be the friend that keeps it all inside and just places a smile on her face and helps others feel better. As for me and my problems, I don't like to bother people.
Joyce Meyer always says, "Don't go to the phone, go to the throne."♥

 All in all, I enjoyed my first week of doing college from home.♥

A funny thing happened yesterday. I visited Saint Leo and I realized that it's totally not the same anymore. I just went there for the free printing and to see how my beloved prodigy (the free coffee) was doing. Not good, I might add. It was missing the love in every cup. Anyway, long story short, I slipped on and off campus like a ninja and it was awesome. It cured my nostalgia for the place. And I understand now, that God is writing a new chapter in my life. I'm not stuck; I'm actually on my way to a greater destination.♥

 Thank you Mandy Hale who I'm proud to say is a NYT best-selling author now! Seeing her become a best-selling author and knowing how hard she's worked and how patiently she's trusted in God, just goes to show that NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD. It only inspires me more since I also have a similar dream to be a NYT best-selling author♥

Which leads me to my final point.


Lastly, I've put myself in the running for a scholarship competition sponsored by Dr. Pepper. You can vote for me here I WANT OTHERS TO KNOW NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE. Please be advised that it takes all of two seconds to complete the voting process(you must vote from a computer as voting from a phone doesn't work for most people) and it costs you nothing. It would mean the world to me if by October 20th (the first deadline for the contest) that I could make it to 250 votes at least. Yet, I've been extremely upset with how lightly people are taking this. I'm not asking for an organ donation or even any monetary support from all of you. I'm just asking for you to BE A FRIEND and support me for literally two seconds. I could care less about anything else right now. I'm just determined to get people involved in believing that nothing is impossible. I'm not concerned about winning as much as I am trying to like always, change one person's view on life. 

It honestly sickens me that the majority of my votes were from strangers instead of my friends but to the friends who have voted and shared the link, thank you for supporting me in my day of small beginnings because in my day of great endings, I will remember the goodness and kindness you showed me. I'm just that type of person. That's how I was raised, to always be grateful. And plot twist: a grateful attitude means a happier person♥ If you think of all you have to be grateful for, instead of all you do not yet have, you will be happier, believe me. It's how I start all my prayers. It's how I start my night time journaling. I literally have a blessing journal where I thank God for each of the good things that I experienced that day (even if it just happened to be that he gave me another day, or a goodnight's sleep, or even just a day where my dogs were extremely loving to me on a day when I may not have been lovable).

So I'm done listening to everyone I know give me excuses of why they can't vote for me and instead like all matters of free will, I'm giving this whole Dr. Pepper contest to God because if not, I will become a completely different person. And yes, I mean, I may have to start removing kneecaps. And as much as it's fun to joke around about mob strategies, I'm not really interested in the effort it would take for me to want to do that to people who obviously can't even give me two seconds of their time.

Therefore, just like Jesus on the cross, I have made this my daily confession: "Father, forgive them, for they don't know what they are doing."♥

Personal shoutout to Jazmine Thomas for being awesome!!! You are the definition of a true friend. I'm so blessed to have "met" you through the Single Woman Crew. I look forward to the day I will get to see you in person. It's going to be epic, for sure.♥

Until next time, remember: No trumpets sound when the important decisions of our life are made. Destiny is made known silently. -Agnes De Mille.



Love Times Infinity,
Chelsea
xoxo
God Bless
~Just Keep Swimming~




Friday, August 8, 2014

The Bombest Birthday Yet: You Have All You Need♥

Happiness is a form of courage... THIS IS THE PART WHEN I SAY I DON'T WANT IT. I'M STRONGER THAN I'VE BEEN BEFORE. THIS IS THE PART WHEN I BREAK FREE BECAUSE I CAN'T RESIST IT NO MORE.

Oh sorry, I was just jamming out. It's been about 3 weeks since I let those negative people go from my life and wow, I can honestly say I made a good decision. I don't even miss those people at all. Sorry if that sounds harsh. It's also been 3 weeks since I've updated all of you on my life so here goes.

Anyway, so as most of you may know or don't know, I finally found an internship around the beginning of July and I was all excited about it and it was going lovely and almost seemed too good to be true but because I now have to wait for it either to work out or not, I cannot share the details of it with you like I had wanted to. I find it incredibly hard to believe that God would bring such a great opportunity in front of me only to allow it to fall apart in front of my eyes so I'm going to have faith that God will either cause it to work out or provide me a better opportunity.

Other than that, last Wednesday I went on an job interview for Popeyes. They are opening a new store by my house and I need a job so I applied. I have no fast food experience. Yet, I knew if God wanted me to have the job, he would provide me with the grace to complete it. Yet, the day of the interview, I was running on four hours of sleep and I was completely nervous for it. I'm weird like that. I have no problem talking to people who look like Ryan Sheckler or Ryan Follese' but when it comes to things like job interviews, they are my Achilles heel. I went to the interview and felt good about it. I was literally there for seven minutes. I was proud of myself for doing it afraid. Yet, it's been a week and they never called. Oh well, no hard feelings. My job will come. God provides.♥

Last Saturday was extremely eventful. I went back to school shopping (my favorite kind. Was I the only little kid growing up that was so excited to by new supplies for class. Oops, my nerdy chick is showing.) and I came out alive with only a student planner from Barnes and Nobles that has a lion on the cover that strangely looked like Saint Leo's mascot. Yeah, I can't avoid Saint Leo like I can't avoid Miley Cyrus or Kim Kardashian. Somehow they just show up in my social media feed or on my tv. It's a little bit creepy but I just know for a fact that my God-given destiny is to graduate from Saint Leo. ♥

Anyway, Keegan Allen from Pretty Little Liars was there (at the Wiregrass Mall) and this was as close as I got to him:


In case you are unfamiliar with Keegan, he plays Toby on the show Pretty Little Liars. I'm a fan of the show but I'm not crazy obsessed with the cast so I didn't get in line for his meet and greet. I don't know. He wasn't that cute in person. I also thought it was disingenuous of him to look at each person for two seconds, scribble his autograph, and have them on their way. I understand he had to meet a lot of fans but he could have given them at least two minutes each. 
We headed to Busch Gardens because that night, Cher Lloyd was scheduled to be in concert for the Summer Nights event. For this, I was fangirling. I'm a big fan of Cher Lloyd and her music. For those that don't know her, she's a 5'2" twenty-one year old singer/rapper from the UK who won the UK version of the X-Factor. Ever since, her popularity grew in the U.S. and she is most famous for her hit song, "Want U Back." 
Yet, we arrived at Busch Gardens at around 2 p.m. and we decided we would just chill until it was time for the show. We have annual passes so it is no big deal to spend the day at Busch Gardens. Of course once Jayde's new beau Joe got his pass, we took some pictures:



Once again, I found a penny heads-up and thought maybe I was going to meet Cher Lloyd too but that wasn't what that penny ended up meaning. 
 We ended up seeing two shows Burn The Floor and Opening Night Critters. I already saw Burn The Floor before but this was the first time seeing Opening Night Critters at Busch Gardens. For more about the show, Click here. We ended up going into the show just before a lightning storm came over Busch Gardens so God gave me the penny because he wanted to remind me that he would protect me from all harm. Plus, the show was so cute. I love watching dogs do tricks. All the animals in the show are rescued from shelters so at least they are doing great things with their lives now. ♥

Afterward, the sky cleared up and after stopping by the bakery, we headed to get a seat at the concert. I noticed that there was a lot more people at the park and realized that meeting Ryan from Hot Chelle Rae was a definite divine appointment which still blows my mind. We waited for the concert to start as a heavy breeze started blowing and I had a feeling another storm was approaching. You can see from this picture how ominous the sky looked:

Finally at 8:30 p.m. on Saturday August 2nd, Cher Lloyd took the stage. She opened with her song Just Be Mine. Yet after that her set list wasn't that impressive. So we headed out but first, here's some pictures of Cher on stage♥



Thank God we got out when we did because basically two miles down the road we headed into a torrential downpour and lightening storm and Cher tweeted this about this concert:
I guess her show got cut short. Sucks for all the die-hard fans that came out to see her. 

Monday morning I woke up to the sound of thunder and the strange realization that it was my birthday. Then at 8:37 a.m. I was officially 23. My mom left for work at around that time which I thought was kind of funny. Anyway, the storm passed and I went in the family room to check the weather radar (Gotta love Bay News 9) and my youngest sister was in there making breakfast. I was surprised to find her up so early. I walked into the room and she presents me with this, 
 and goes, "Happy Birthday! I made you breakfast." I thought it was the sweetest thing ever. I didn't expect it at all. I love how she knew how much I love when my food is shaped like hearts and she got the whole thing to look like a heart-eyes emoji. Love you Jamie. At least one of us can cook. :)

Then, I went outside and enjoyed a swim in my pool. It was so refreshing. My phone blew up all day with so many happy birthday greetings and it was the absolute best. I want to thank all of those who went out of their way to make my birthday a happy one or to wish me a happy one. You are awesome. I mean it.

A special shoutout to my roommate Carrie who wrote me the sweetest Facebook post, my friend Jazmine who was the first to wish me happy birthday and shouted me out on Twitter, my friend Jasmine who spent the majority of my birthday texting me and keeping the conversation going (i hate one-sided conversations just in case anyone cares to know that), and for unexpected people who wished me happy birthday that I didn't expect was going to even acknowledge me. 

I spent the whole day doing what I love, writing, and working hard on my novel. It was the absolute best. I was also happy to finally type up that chapter because it finally freed me of a lot of the scars I have been talking about in previous posts. Plus, shoutout to my sister Jamie, who bought me a Dunkin latte. You are truly the greatest seester ever!

 My mom made me Twix Pie and my family sang me Happy Birthday. :)


 

All in all, it was a great birthday. I ended up with money to buy myself some nice things. I ended up getting Hot Chelle Rae's first and second CDs Lovesick Electric and Whatever, Francesca Batistelli's new CD If We're Honest ( I like buying the audio cds because I like knowing who wrote what songs and who the band members thank in the back of the little book that comes with the CD. I know. I'm weird.), and Mandy Hale's new book Never Been To Vegas because I wanted the finalized version even though I already read it and loved it Here is the review I did :) I also finally got to renew my subscription to the Writer Magazine after not reading it for a year. My sister Jayde gave me a $10 AMC giftcard. As you can see, it was a blessed birthday. 

The next day, we went bowling for my birthday as a family: 





 My sister Jayde is a brunette now.




I lost gracefully because what kind of birthday girl would I be if I was the queen of the day and also won the game of family bowling. I did end up bowling a strike. Here's how it went down:

 My dad gave me advice on how to align myself and my wrist so that I have better accuracy. 

 Then, once I got a strike, everyone was happy. 

 My family is a bunch of competitive fools, I tell you. This is why I'm not involved in sports. I'm about the game. Not all about whether I win or lose.

As I turned out, my dad won like the jock that he is and everyone in my family is better at bowling than me. But hey, we all had fun, didn't we family?




Did anyone else noticed that my mom and Jayde matched and Jamie and I matched? We didn't even plan on anything. 


Then, we went home and played a board game as a family. We played the game of Life. I ended up winning with 2, 320,000 dollars collected and what was even funnier was that I married Zac Efron and ended up being the one with the most kids. Who knew the guy was so fertile? ♥

Overall, it was a good birthday and week. Yet, I am fully convinced that I have all that I need. I am fully registered for my classes despite the setback of yet another bill and am excited to not have to physically go to class and sit through a boring lecture. I'm very excited for this school year and believe though it be my last college school year, it will be my best. 

When God knows I need a job, he will provide one. I mean, what are the chances that a Popeyes just pops up five minutes from your house. Right now, God just wants me to finish school and be grateful for what I do have in my life: a loving family, three amazing dogs, a dope group of friends, divine connections, and divine appointments. Sure, I don't have a car but when God knows I need it, he won't be one second late. God knows I need an internship to graduate so he will provide the perfect divinely appointed opportunity (see Galatians 1:1). For Psalm 34:10 says, The lions may grow weak and hungry but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.♥

Before I leave you with a final thought, please remember to be grateful for what you have in your life right now because a bad attitude will lead to you losing it all. Always be thankful and stop feeling sorry for yourself. It does absolutely no one good. For anyone, not even you. Someone needed that. Trust me.
Until next time, remember: "If you will be faithful right where you are; knowing that you have exactly what you need for the season that your in, God will get you to where you're supposed to be." -Joel Osteen♥

Love Times Infinity,
Chelsea 
xoxo
God Bless!
~Just Keep Swimming~













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