So this morning, the sadness still was heavy in my heart. It was less a sadness of why am I still single and more of a why am I still so shy?
I've found that throughout my life I've been a shy person mostly because of what happened to me the first time I ever ventured out in a social setting, I was publicly rejected and humiliated. And yeah, what's that the singer Aaliyah once sang, If at first you don't succeed, dust yourself and try again.
Then, there's been a lot of other public rejection I've faced. (outside of my writing career) and it's left me really struggling socially. Most of which, you will read about once my memoir is released.
Normally, at 24 years old, you are at the top of your game because you finally have friends you trust and can confide in, and hang out with.
I just struggle opening up to people because they can and will hurt me.
I've realized this may be part of the reason why I'm still single...and now that I've realized it, I'm going to do something about it.
Goals For 2016!
1.Avoid Caffeine after 5 p.m.
2. Get in shape and watch my calories again
3. Write 1000 words every day
4. Trust God with everything (big or small, he cares about it all).
5. Spend time with my dogs and know that it's okay to spoil them with love and cookies.
6. Work on getting my license back and finally getting a car
7. Travel More; Become a Student of Culture
8. Volunteer at my local library
9. Start attending acting workshops again
10. Finding inner peace even in the every day
Here's to making 2016 way better than 2015 but 2015 wasn't all bad:
Until next time, my prayer for 2016 is that you find your God-given destiny and go for it, no matter who or what comes against you because after all, nothing is impossible with God.
Now say this every day of 2016: I Declare...everything that doesn't line up with God's vision for my life is subject to change. Sickness, trouble, lack, mediocrity are not permanent. They are only temporary. I will not be moved by what I see but by what I know. I am a victor and never a victim. I will become all God has created me to be.
Love Times Infinity,
Chelsea
xoxo
God Bless!
~Just Keep Swimming~
